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Scan 1

A young lady took the plan to somewhere so far away, somewhere hot and lively. Somewhere she hasn't gone to before.

In the plane she met a new married couple. They were sitting beside her and were so cute to each other.
She felt warm inside and the feeling of longing to that place became stronger. She was exited about being there, to see someone she knew, to see him again after these years which have past.
He didn't know about that she was coming. She just wanted to see first how things are going there. Then she will come to him and say hi.

The plane arrived at early morning. And the air had begun to be get warm. She felt as if her heart would jump out of her body because of the tension she felt inside. She smiled happily and forced herself to have patient. She took her baggage and went to find a taxi to find a hotel. while she was waiting for the taxi, she looked at the place and the people around. They were not much different from her. She might have a bit different style than the people here. She had a dark blue jeans with a long yellow T-skirt with some Words on it and a simple black sport shoes. And her hair was up like a tail, her hair was so long, black and straight. And she had laid some simple make up, which made her so beautiful in a natural way.

In the way to hotel she watched everything carefully. She wanted to know everything about this country, specially about this city. At last she was at a nice hotel. She went to her room and laid the baggage at the floor and lied down at the bed to rest a bit, rest from that long journey, 8 hours flying. She took a cold shower, which was so comfortable and then she decided to sleep a little bit since she hasn't slept these days because of the excitement. After resting she began with the research about him.


And then slowly she woke up with tears in her eyes. She waved away her tears and stood up on her feet. Went to bathroom and washed her teeth and face. Then she lay a little bit of make up on her face and then she took up her hair and dressed up in black jeans and red long T-skirt and her black sport shoes, and then she took a black chador and went out.

She took a taxi and went to the place he is living. She stood next to his house waited to see him. After an hour or more he came from the right side of her. He was coming from the head street to the street which he would take the right to his house. When he was quite close to her, she began to walk so she crashed with him.
- Sorry, he said in a calm voice and continued to his house.
She smiled and said sorry quietly, after that he went away. She stood still one moment,  was thinking about what she will do next. After some minutes she got an idea. She trained her voice to a different voice while she began to walk to his house and then she knocked at the door. After few minutes he came out and opened the door,
- Hi, What can I help you with? He asked and was bored.
She was so glad to see him, and so stressed, so she was quiet some seconds.
- Excuse me, what do you want? He thought that she was so strange and completely out of her mind. She even didn't answer when some one asked her.
She took a long breath and talked with the voice she was training.
- Sorry, I am just lost, can you help me and even haven't eaten something whole day. Can I eat something before I go?
It was quite true, but...
- Go away, go to another house to eat. He told her in an angry voice after being quiet one second seeing her strangely. And then he closed the door.
She stood there absolutely out of her mind. She didn't believe that! He closed the door at her! She was so angry while she wanted to laugh at what happened just now. She calmed herself down and knocked the door again. No one opened this time. She knocked the door again and after some minutes his mother was out. The young lady was so stressed, what would she do now?
- Yes, my daughter, what do you want? She asked in a nice voice.
The young lady calmed herself again and began to talk with the same voice as she talked before. She told her the same thing as she told him.
- How old are you, my daughter? She asked with a smile.
- I am 21 years old, the young lady told her and smiled back.
- Ok, why are you here, my daughter? it's quite dangerous here at the nights.
- It's not night, it's noon. But anyway I was here seeing an old friend and then when I wanted to go back to my hotel, I lost the way. And I haven't eaten whole day. So I just saw your son in the way, when we crashed, and I thought he could help me, because he looked to be nice. You see I am not from here. I live in Norway, and now I am here because I wanted to see my home city which I haven't seen before.
- Ok my daughter come in, you are welcome. You have to eat something and then my son will take you to your hotel after you have eaten something. Come in please. Come in.
-Oh thank you so much, you are really nice. She was so happy while she was going into his house. It was the first time she saw his house and how he lived. She always wondered how he lived, how his room looked like...
she smiled and wanted to jump of happiness.
He sat in the living room watching a turkey series which she loved to see it too. He looked at her one second and then he looked away in a bothered way.
- Hi, thanks for letting me in. She said in a funny voice, wanted to talk to him, even if it would let him be angry. But the important thing is that she wanted to come him near.
- You are welcome. He said while even not looking at her.
- Do you love these series, I love it too, have you seen "the moment of farewell" or "the lost dream"? It was so good.
- Yes I have, but can you please let me watch this series now..
- Oh off course, I am sorry
He thought what a bothering women, and even with that chador which she had. She looks like a witch.
She smiled inside of herself. He had right to behave so harshly. It was even a bit cute about his behaviour.
His mother came in with something to eat, and the young lady thanked her and began to eat.
- How is Norway, is it a beautiful place?
- Yes, it is. It's green and nice.
- Where in Norway do you live?
- I live in a city near Oslo, the capital.
- Ah nice, and do you live with your family?
- Well I lived with my mother. And all my sisters and brothers have now their own lives, I mean they are married.
- Ah and you? Are you married or engaged?
- Oh no, I am not. I am still free. And I enjoy it as well.
- That's good. What do you do, do you study or working my daughter?
- M m well I'm just studying, but sometimes in the holidays I work as well...
- What are you studying?
- I am studying apothecary and work sometimes in the holidays with my friend in a big shop.
- are you alone here?
- Yes I am, my mother couldn't come, so she let me come here alone.
- She let you to come alone?
- Yes, because she knows me, who I am, and because I wouldn't be anyway alone here. I have many related ones here. But I just have to call them and see them. But I haven't done that, since I arrived today at morning. I just called my closest friend, and saw her today. She lived at Norway too.
- Good. She smiled and began too watch the series.
- Do you see these series in Norway?
- Yes we do, you know we have MBC there too, so..
- Good. She smiled again and continued to see the series.
- I have to go now, before it is really dark outside. Thank you for everything. I won't forget what you did to me. The young lady hugged his mother and thanked her a lot after eating and sitting with them a little bit.
- No it's nothing to thank for my daughter. You are welcome whenever you need something. You know now where we live. So don't be shy and come to see us.
My son, go and take her to the hotel she lives in.
He looked at his mother one second like being disturbed and said ok and went out with her to start the car. The young lady sat in the car with him and was so quiet. He was quiet too. The car started and his mother waved and the young lady waved back.
- Which hotel do you live in? He asked in a cold voice.
- In Al - Kathemia, in front of the holy mosque. She replayed him stressed. - What's your name?
- You don't have to know my name
- I am Sheida, nice to meet you. She smiled and felt happy. She didn't have to lie while she didn't say the truth either.
- Ok.
- Why are you so bothered by me? I haven't done to you anything bad, have I?
- No you haven't, I just don't know you..
- Is it because the chador you dislike me?
- Who said that?
- Because you see my chador always, I have white too. She smiled, she felt as joking with him like she used to do, before.
- How should I then see you if your chador has covered your face.
- I don't know. - Can you slow down, you drive too fast!
- Don't worry, you won't die. We are soon there anyway.
Both sat quiet and looked at the way. She wished that she could just say who she was and just hug him. Oh she wished just to kiss him this night before going to her room. But what would he think of her. It would be worse,  that a lady kissed him after the first meeting, and even with a chador covering herself with.
She was so down, but still so happy. She was so badly in love with him like she used to do..
The car stopped and they were there near the door of the hotel.
- Thanks, it was so nice of you to take me to the hotel. Hope to see you again Aous.
And she opened the door and went out, was so stressed. She said his name, without knowing.
- Hey wait, how did you know my name is Aous?
- Thank you for everything, Good night and sweet dreams
- Hey! I told you to wait! He was so angry now, and curious.
She stood still without going back. He came out from the car and went to her.
- Who are you?
- I told you, I am Sheida.
- How do you know my name?
- I probably heard it from your mum.
- Mm you might have right. Good night. He said quietly and went away, started the car and drove away.

In the way back he thought about that strange woman. He felt as he knew her. But how and when has he seen her. He thought that she hided something, anyway she was really strange. And the way she was dressed, the shoes, a sport black shoes with a chador, it doesn't go together. Who cares anyway...

Scan 2

The next day early at the morning, about 4 o'clock, she woke up, ate bread with cheese and a kop of tea. And then she dressed up and lay a little bit of make up and then she took the black chador, since the women here take blacker chador than any other colures and the sandals. And then she took a taxi to Aous' house. She waited in the taxi quite one hour and then he was out with his car. She told the taxi to shadow him wherever he was going to. So the taxi did and then Aous stopped near the official hospital. Parked the car there and went in.
The young lady thanked the taxi and gave him the money and went inside too. She went after him quietly and saw him going into a room. She stood one moment without a single step. What is she doing? She shadowed a person! How awful is that! But she had to, because knowing if he is the same, if he hadn't someone he loved or maybe he was engaged, who know after these years what would happen.

She went to the reception.
- Hi, excuse me, is doctor Aous working here?
- Yes, what can I help you with?
- I want an appointment.
- Ok he is not free this week, can you until next week?
- Is there not one single time earlier?
- No I am sorry, but you can talk to him, maybe he has ...
- Oh no, I mean, it's ok with next week. Which time is it?
- It's on Thursday at 14: 20.
- It is ok. I will take it.
- Ok then.
- Thanks.
The young lady went out and sat on the stairs outside and thought about what she did just now. Until then, till that appointment she has to keep her identity a secret.
She got a perfectly idea. She took a taxi and told him to take her to optics; there they have glasses and lenses. And the taxi driver did as she told him. He drove her to a good optics; there she bought a green colour lenses and a beautiful sunglasses. She even wanted to change her hair colour but she felt like she really wanted to have her own hair colour which she loved so much. So she decided to keep it but instead change the model of it, she will make it curly, just at the top of it.
She went to the hotel, tested everything she had, and then she went out to buy some new beautiful dresses. She bought red, green, blue and black dresses. And then she bough some shawls in different colours, because she wanted to have it on her neck. She bought even new shoes with heels in different colours, and some handbags. And then she went to hotel and laid everything she wanted to wear on her bed. And then she paired them together, and hang them in the cupboard. And then she decided to sleep and tomorrow she will go forward to the next step. 

Scan 3

At the early morning she ate something and then she laid some make up which made her look fresh and good. And then she dressed in a dark blue dress with the blue shawl and took her black shoes with the heel and a black handbag. And laid the green lenses and maid her hair a bit curly on the tops and made a little braid from the top of the head to half away and the rest of the hair she let it be. And she laid a really good perfume and then she took a taxi to the half way to the hospital and then she began to walk instead.

When she saw him coming from a long way, she crossed the way, so he would see her, in front of him.
And off course he saw her and stopped the car so she could cross the street. She smiled at him as a thanks and continued to walk. He smiled back and waited until she would past.
She felt so nervous that he would recognize her, or something. But still she felt so happy and began to walk with a straight back with sable steps and was smiling all the time. She even was happy because he was looking at her, in the way she liked. Well he hasn't changed at all. Not at least looking at pretty ladies. And it made her kind of happy, that he hasn't changed.
Later after that she crossed the street and he drove away.
She stood in the middle of the way and thought to go to the hospital, walking since it's not so far away and waiting for him on his car. It might be a risk, but she loved to take risks, so she accepted the challenge. She sat on the car as she decided and waited, until she was so bored. She thought about how long he will be inside. It was quite boring to sit here so long. So she decided to go in and eat something, since she was even a little bit hungry. And then when she was eating she saw him come to the restaurant and eat too. She was really happy because of the luck she had. She couldn't believe that he was going to eat here at the same restaurant.
After that he took something to eat, he sat on a table eating with some other persons. He began to talk to them and was quite enjoying sitting with them. She was a bit sad because she sat alone while he sat there too but at another table with some other people. But still she was happy to see him happy. She began to look at him, how he talked, how he laughed and yeah... She missed to see him sitting in front of her talking like that. So she enjoyed watching him.
But suddenly he looked at her and smiled. Without knowing she continued to watch him and smiled back, like an idiot. And then when she woke up from her dream she directly turned around and began to see another place, and began to small eat. And then looked at him again, wanted to see if he saw her or not. And what a relief he didn't looked at her now. He talked with his friends. So she smiled a little bit and watched him again while she ate. After some minutes he and all at the table went to their jobs. But Aous came close to her and sat beside her. She was so nervous, so she dropped the fork. She wanted to go away now. How could she be so fearless, and dare to come after him like that and watch him like she did. 
He took the fork from the floor and laid it at the table.
- Hi, I am Aous. He said with a smile and took up his hand to shake hands.
- Hi, she forced herself to replay and sat quiet without noticing that she had to take her hand up to shake hands. When she noticed that he had his hand still up she directly took her hand up and shock hands. She felt as a fire inside of her blowed. But still she forced to give him a smile.
- Why did you watch me all the time?
- Hm Did I?
-Yeah you did, you even smiled back at me...
She sat quiet one second and didn't say something
- Do I know you? You look familiar...
- No you don't know me! She said with a laud vice directly. She was so scared of knowing her.
- Ok, ok take it easy, what's your name?
- Hmm Sheida..
- Sheida?  he asked quietly and  thought "How strangely, the same name as the chador woman who came to us yesterday"
He smiled and sat quiet one minute
- Ok then, if you want something you can come to my room. I have to go now. See you
- Ok see you.
She sat quiet while she wanted to jump and scream. She felt her beating heart beat so fast and it felt as if it would jump outside because of the strength which it beat with. She couldn't think at that moment. What did just happen...? He came to her.
She smiled and finished the food in her plate and went out. She smiled happily and sat on his car again and shut her eyes, she wanted to see him in front of her like he was just now. Then she looked what he had inside of the car. The car was quite clean. She liked him really when he was that clean. Oh she felt so in love with him even more now then before. What would she do? But he didn't remember her. Well he did maybe feel as if he knew her... But how couldn't he directly remember her when they shock hands. She thought that he would directly remember her by the feeling. But off course she hadn't green eyes, and didn't usually dress like that. But she liked it, and maybe she will continue to wear in that style.

He made her out of control, and she in strange way liked it. She could do anything with him, even if it was to jump from the mountain. After one hour he came out and saw her sitting on his car.
- Hi again, he said with a smile and came to her, and his car.
- Hi... do you have time for me? I am bored and I don't know many people around.
- Going out with me? He asked and smiled, as if it was strange to hearing that
- If you don't mind... she said quietly and looked down.
- No I don't mind. I am bored too. Where do you want to go?
- Have no idea, anywhere... She looked at him and smiled her luckiest and purest smile
- Ok, get in the car.
- Ok, where are we going?
- You will know that soon.
They got in the car and he began to drive away from the hospital.
- Can I ask you something?
- Yeah off course
- Are you free man, I mean, are you engaged or married?
- No, I am free man... He said with a smile
- Ok, don't think that I want something from you, it is just that... She suddenly stopped and was quiet. She became so nervous and wanted to cry. Because now it kind of hurt to be with him. But still what should she do?
He saw her and smiled, thought what a strange girl, who goes out even with someone she doesn't know, but still being so beautiful. He felt something, as he knew her. Something in her, which made him feel that he didn't want to hurt her, but still...
She looked down and felt a bit bad about being with him now.
"He doesn't know who I am and he might think that I am a chip girl who just goes out with guys. But what can I do now, when I am already with him. It's just to make this day goes good." She thought while she sat quiet in the car.
Whole the way they sat quiet. He didn't say something neither she did.

They was there, the place he drove her to, after quite one hour. She got out from the car and he parked it somewhere near. And then they sat on a big stone and watched the view in front.
- It's nice here and peaceful.
- Yes it is.
- Do you come here often?
- Just when I have time and want to be alone.

She looked at him when he was busy with his own thought and felt so warm inside. He has became older, not like he was about 4 years ago. He was still a child. His face was still childish and pure, but now he became a man. She smiled and looked away, she looked at the place.
She thought about how many times she wished to be with him in the places she had as her place. In Sweden there she has lived all these years. Places there she sat lonely and cried, places which she went to, to be alone, to thinking, to dreaming. She used to dream often about him, so her loneliness and the feeling of missing him and longing to him would be lesser. Just to be able to continue her life.
O how many times she wondered where he was, what he is doing. She wondered often if he remembered her or has he already forgotten her, if he is thinking about her or not.



To be continued...

Day 4

The young lady sat on her bed, thinking about what happened yesterday. It was like a dream. He was so nice with her and they talked about everything and sometimes they just sat quietly. Everything was just perfect. He was with her until she told him that she wanted to go, after they sat and seeing the sunset together. So he drove her to the place she told him to. A place which is near Al - Kathemia but still wasn't the same place as she was at, so he wouldn't find out something about her. And then she took a taxi to her hotel.
She couldn't believe that she could stand with not telling him who she was. 
The most important thing is that he hadn't someone, he was a free man. O what a wonderful feeling to see him again.
She couldn't sleep of the happiness, she thought about him whole the night, his hands, his eyes, his smile and everything. GOD she felt now how much she had missed him... She took a hot shower and then she lay at the bed until she slept.

And when she woke up it was already 11 o'clock. She laid make up on her face and laid the green lenses. Then dressed the green dress with a green shawl and took the white handbag with the white shoes with the heel. She made a braid to the down. She took even a book, which she had taken with her from Sweden, to read when she was alone. And then she laid a good perfume as always and went out. She took a taxi to the hospital he is working at.
She saw his car at the same place like yesterday. She went inside and then bought a kop of tea with a cake, since she was a little bit hungry because she hadn't eaten something since she woke up. After finishing the cake and the tea she took up the book and began to read. The book was about nature and that stuff, which she loved to read about.
After some hours she began to feel bored to wait here. But she hadn't a choice so she continued to read. After one more hour she saw his door been opened and this time he came out.
She fixed herself and then laid the book in the handbag. When he saw her, he smiled and closed the door and came to her. She smiled back and said hi when he was close to her.
- So... Have you time for me today too? She said and smiled
- Sure, where do you want to go today? he smiled back and thought that it was quite fun to be with her..
- Hmm I want you to show me this city, I am not from here as you see. So I want to see beautiful places in this city, if it's possible.
- Sure, it will be fun..
And then they got in the car and drove away to some beautiful places, near the river and some other places which has history buildings.
- Can you take me another day to the north, I heard that it's so beautiful there..
- I will try to take off one day and then go to the north
- That's great.
- Are you not afraid from being with a man you don't know?
She sat quiet, what would she say, that she knew him. That she had so memories from him. What would she say. That she was his cousin?
- I am sorry to asking a question like that, but here is not like the place you were in. You can't depend on the guys always.
- I know..
- Then how could you go out with me, in my car to somewhere you even don't know.
- Because I know you won't do anything to me.
He saw her strangely and thought what a woman who even talk with that way as if she was so definitely sure about that.
She smiled at him and looked out of the window.
- Have you a CD or something to listen to? She asked while looking at the way.
- Yeah you can take which CD you want.
- O you have Elissa, off course you have.. she smiled and put it in the CD-player.
- Do you like her?
- Yes, I love her voice and her songs.. She smiled and remembered the time when he told her to listen to a song of her "law ma tiji" (if you won't come) and then she looked out from the window and took out her hands in the air
- where did you live before?
- I lived in Sweden... She said while she was looking out.
- O Sweden.. He thought about his brother and his cousins
- My brother is living there. and my related..
- Mmm..
- Where in Sweden do you live?
- In a south Sweden, this calls Goteborg.
- Ah I think my aunt and my cousin lives there.
- Mmm
- Do you know a girl by the name Wafaa? She must have been the same age as you..
- Maybe, there is not just one girl whose name Wafaa there, you know...
- Ok, by the way, how old are you?
- 21
- Hmm the same as her.
- As who?
- I told you my cousin.
- Ah mm
He looked at her. She was so much like Wafaa, his cousin. But she has brown eyes, not green. And why would she even act like that if she was the same. He thought to talk to his brother and see how the things go there. Maybe ask about his cousin and see if she is there or hear the news to be sure about the thought. Anyway, he would hear if his cousin came here, he thought.
The young lady smiled inside. She felt happy that he mentioned her name. It was quite nice to hear him say her name. Oh what would she do if he got know who she was. Well she didn't care, she wanted to live now. To just let thing go like it should go.


To be continued...

Day 5 ->

She slept this night very well. She dreamed of him. O what a wonderful life it is, she thought. He took her hand when they were in the car going back. And she didn't take away her hand either. And before he drove away he said that he will wait for her tomorrow, for the lunch.

She woke up early this day and took a shower. Then she sat beside the window and watched the sunrise and listened to the music thru her phone. And then she read some hours in the book till she finished it. She was happy and at the same time sad, because she missed her family. She told them that she went with her class to Egypt. She has to go to a cafe shop where there are computers, so she would talk with them or to send a mail. So they won't be worried about her. Especially her mum didn't want to let her go alone, but she told her that she won't be alone, that she will be with her whole class. She knows it's bad to lie, but she hadn't any other choices. She felt as she was going to be crazy if she didn't see him, just to make sure what is true and what's lie.

She ate an apple and then laid a little make up and the lenses and then dressed the black dress with the black things as shawl, handbag and the shoes with the heel. Then she laid a good perfume and went to the hospital, as she promised. And then when she was there she knocked the door quietly. And then opened it to see if he was there and maybe if he was alone to make a surprise and then go to eat as they had planed. But when she opened the door there was a girl, a young girl about 18 years old, sitting at his desk and talking to him so softly. He was sitting in his chair and talked to her softly too and they were so close to each other. She stood without knowing what to say or what to do. She couldn't understand what she saw. It wasn't a good view, absolutely not. She felt as she couldn't move her body. She just wanted to sit at the floor. This can't be true. This is just a dream, just a dream.
The tears began to drop without knowing. She turned around at last and shut the door. She didn't care if it was quietly or hard. She just wanted to go out of here. She wanted to go back and never come.
After that he heard the shutting door, he went out to see who it was, and saw that it was the girl who he met these days. She saw him surely with that girl. What would he do. He stood there without moving a step. The girl, who were inside, came out looked at him..
- Who was it?
- No one. He said angry
- Ok then I will go, see you later. She said without waiting the answer.
The young lady walked the street along. She was so broken. After that he took her hand and told her to meet tomorrow again, he does that. Who was she? He said that he was a free man. How can then they sit like that. Is he just playing around with girls? He is 25 years old now! For GOD sake! He is not that young to just play around as if he was 20!

 The man began to run after her. And saw her that she was walking down the street. He didn't know what he would say, but he didn't want to lose her. He didn't feel the same feelings with her than anyone else.
- Hey wait. He shouted.

She stood without moving a step.
- Why did you go away?
She was quiet. She didn't know what to say to him anymore.
- I had just patient you could at least say something when you came in.
She turned around and saw him with the tears dropping from her eyes. She thought how wrong she had about him. She didn't believe anyone when they talked about him. She defended him always and told them to stop talking about him like that.
- Please stop to cry. You know me just for 3 days, not well to cry that much. He said in a calm voice and came closer.
- O Aous you are so broken. You don't know anything. You are still the same, plying with everyone. You think that all is a game in your hands. You are so lost and so dead. Who was she?
- No one
- See, you don't even know what you want. GOD how fooled I was about you.'
She turned around and began to walk. She thought that she had to forget him this time. Forever... She know now what the truth is, who the one she loved was. She saw him this time with her own eyes.
And he understood that she was his own cousin. He has called his brother but he told him that she went to Egypt. But here it goes, she came to him instead, he thought. It has to be her.
- Would go like that? Will you go back after coming to me after these years?
- You have no right to tell me what to do, you have no idea what I have gone through!
- Do you know what I have gone through then?
- It is so clear what you have gone through like today, you have nothing to lose. If I went away you will go with another the day after. GOD you don't know what love even means. To you it's just a game, but do you know, I had enough! I was so innocent when I was youger. When you fooled around with me like everyone else. I was just 15 years old when I fell in love with you. GOD you don't even respect others. Not even been worried about others.
But I am 21 years old now. You can't fool me now. I have seen with my eyes who you are!
- Are you finished? So let me tell you that you have right with every word you said. But I really was true with you. I never fooled around with you. And now, no one means to me like you. Will you just kill our memories like that? Will you just throw away everything you had done for me? Will you go back with nothing?
- O Aous, the one won't change, that I have learned from these years. O what I have seen these years which have past. You have no idea how my life was like. You just knew about my news thru your brother, and I knew yours thru you brother and sister and everyone else.
But I had no idea how you felt, what the truth was. And now I came because of that, because I want to know the truth about you. And I saw it. You won't change even if you want, like I won't change even if I want. I will be that clear hearted always.
Now after what I have seen and learned, I know now how to go on with my life, even without losing my pureness. Because I love who I am, I don't want to be like you ever.

She took now a taxi and the taxi drove away. He stood there didn't know what to do or what to say. He began to walk to the hospital. He went to his room and closed the door. Sat on his chair and drove back the time. He saw everything which had happened in his life. What he has done and what he hasn't done.




When she was at the hotel she sat on her bed. She thought how happy she was just some minutes ago, and now how awful she felt. O she didn't want to feel this pain. She lay down and cried out her pain. She felt so lonely and miserable. She cried and then she fell asleep with the tears in her eyes, she fell asleep without changing her clothes. When she woke up, it was dark outside. She went and changed her clothes to a simple dress- Then after some minutes, when she sat completely lost at the bed, someone knocked at the door. .
- Who is it?
- I am your cousin.
- What do you want?
- Just to talk.
- About what?
- Can you open the door?
- Why would I open the door?
- Please..
She opened the door and stood at the door looking at him
- What do you want?
- Want to come inside.
She went and sat at the bed without saying a word.
He came in and closed the door and then sat at the bed too, but a little bit far away from her.
- I am sorry.
She was quiet and didn't even think about something. Her head was so empty
- about everything. What should I do to make the time go back?
- I am sorry too. I wish I could make the time go back too...
He came closer to her and hugged her.
- I have missed you...
She sat quiet and didn't move.
He took her slowly down and took her hands and lay close to her. She looked at him as if she was dead. Wondered what he was doing, but couldn't move.
- I love you... He said quietly and softly and kissed her. She laid there and just moved her head. Now she couldn't even kiss him. The kiss she was dreaming about all the time. This time it was so meaningless, everything was meaningless. She felt as so awful. All her love just became pain. He looked at her, saw her looking at him so coldly and so lost. He moved away, laid at his back and looked at the roof.
She felt as if the tears began to stream again. Everything was so different from her imagination. Love wasn't like she thought. The love wasn't like in the books so strong and lovely. This time love was just painful.
But still something in her began to burn when he kissed her. O if just everything was different. She went closer to him and touched his hair. O she was still in love with him after all this. She thought about how it was before, how she forgave him always and began to talk to him again. O he made her always out of control.
She took his head close to her.
He moved closer to her and hugged her. They lay like this whole the night, without a single word. O only thing which mattered for her to be with him at this time. Just to be with him this night. O how she wished to forget everything and just be with him. She wished that she could be sure that he won't be unfaithful after marriage. But she knew that always the one would go back to how they were. O she just wanted to marry him. That's all, even if the whole world was against it. But after what she saw, she began to be scared from him.

He wished she would forgive him for today, and stay forever here with him. He didn't want to be with anyone els than her. She was the only one he wanted to continue his life with.



At the end she took the plane the day after and never came back. She just laid her blue heart in his desk, in the hospital before she flew away.
She just had him as a memory, a nice memory which she kept it inside. She never told anyone about these days which she were with him. Nothing about the night and the meetings, neither did he.

When she came back she told her family that the journey ended to fast. So she came early.
And then she continued her life as he continued his.